Aren’t you better yet?

Chances are, if you’ve been meditating or engaging in other healthy lifestyle practice AND are a human being living in this modern world, you probably heard one or more of these comments before…

“Wow you still get headaches! Shouldn’t meditation have fixed that by now?”

“Why don’t you feel better yet? I mean you eat so healthy, do yoga and meditate every day…”

“How did she get cancer? Isn’t she a nutritionist, yoga teacher and spiritual healer? Shouldn’t this have prevented that?”

“How did this happen to him? Couldn’t his spiritual teacher see this? Why didn’t he do something to change it?”

“Why does she still have that condition? Looks like those Ayurveda treatments aren’t working…”

“How are you still feeling fear, anxiety and anger… aren’t you a meditation teacher? Haven’t you been doing this for years? Shouldn’t you have gotten rid of all that by now?”

And the list goes on.

Maybe this is even the dialogue you’ve had with yourself.

It’s easy to understand the well-meaning behind it. I mean we’re sold to believe that if we start doing X, Y or Z then after a (usually relatively short) period of time our life will become perfect. No more pain. No more disease. No more change. Things will just somehow fall into perfect place and never move from there again. And if that doesn’t happen, then what we’re doing to try and help ourselves be healthier and happier each day isn’t working. And therefore, not worth it.

Now this makes sense on one level. But it’s actually completely absurd on another.

Because to be honest, we really have no idea of the complex intricacies of this thing we call ‘life’. We think we come in with a clean slate. A fresh body starting from zero. But really, how did we get these bodies we live in? What choices did we make to end up right here, right now? What past actions have created our present? And what ‘future’ is to come? How does my consciousness play into this body life? And who designed this whole thing anyway?!

Over the years we may be able to look back in retrospect and give a good shot at answering some of these. We might look back and see how maybe the way it unfolded was always for our benefit. Maybe things are ‘always evolving’. But in the moment of pain and confusion, it can look like pure chaos. Like we’ve been abandoned. Forgotten about. The intelligence of the universe took a holiday and were left to make do with what we’ve got. And it’s these moments that we tend grasp to old ideas and quick fixes. Falling into the false notion that something has gone wrong and we need to make it right.

But what if it was never wrong? What if it was all perfectly designed from the beginning? Yes, even the hellish nights of fear and confusion, the deep depression and wailing anxiety, the failing of businesses and relationships. What if it was all part of the resolution?

What if it continues to be part of your inner REVOLUTION?

What if instead we said, “Wow, imagine how much worse this would be WITHOUT meditation. Imagine the pain ALONG WITH intense suffering. Imagine the stories I’d still be wrapped up in. Imagine the disconnect I’d be feeling. Imagine the loneliness and fear of never getting out of here.”

What if the reason you came to meditation/yoga/healing was not the reason you ended up staying? What if you found something so much greater that without the pain, you never would have gone looking for? What if pain ended up being your greatest teacher? The guru that brought you to awaken to your very own Self?

A dialogue begins within that starts to reflect this seeing...

Pain is manageable when you realise you’re already free inside. That’s what meditation has given me. I realise I’m free beyond this pain… even if my body contracts, I expand. And maybe, just maybe this pain is my gift. The resolution of lifetimes of ignoring my Self. This pain is the impetus to go deeper within, to connect with healers and beings of love. This pain is my empathy. This pain forces me to align myself with nature. To realise I’m not separate from it. Maybe this pain is showing me that the antidote all along was love. That all we really need is love.

And so I make it clear to myself.

This life is my life and I accept it fully. Only through acceptance do I step out of the energy of blame and victimhood and step into the power to make change. Acceptance doesn’t mean I don’t do anything about my situation. Acceptance means I fully bring myself into this present moment, I see what’s needed and I act on that. Acceptance brings me into my innate power as a co-creator of this life. It’s self-love in action. It’s surrender blooming. And I continue to write this story with every cell of this body. Every grain of feeling. Witnessed by the Self. I accept it all. In the process I stay and bow deeper and deeper in gratitude and surrender. I know one day this will all make sense. And I’m not in this alone.

I place my hand on heart and I say ‘It’s OK my love. You are safe. I love you.’ Together we take a deep breath and exhale. Feeling the presence of something greater in my continual surrender.

Then I get up from meditation, turn on the kettle and decide what I’m going to make for breakfast.

Today is another day. And if the sun can rise, then so can I.